August 24, 2023

Transcript Ep #212: Taming Imposter Syndrome with Sydnea Lewis

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Transcript Ep #212: Taming Imposter Syndrome with Sydnea Lewis

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Taming Imposter Syndrome with Sydnea Lewis

– Transcript Ep #212

Hint of Hustle Podcast Cover

Heather Sager  1:21  

Well, hey, friends, welcome back to another episode of the Hint of Hustle podcast. This week, I’m coming at you with another inspiring interview from one of my graduates of the signature talk accelerator. Her name is Cynthia Lewis, and she is a professor. She is a design agency owner. She also has her personal brand that she’s really been kicking off over the last six months, and she has one heck of a story for you. This episode is all around dealing with impostor syndrome, the releasing perfection, the messy middle that comes from getting your ideas on paper, or in a Google doc to actually present in the world. We talked about what it truly takes to seek out and receive critiques. Now, this is probably my favorite part of this conversation. Because I don’t know about you. But I’ve noticed in this online world with digital courses, it’s really easy for us to hide in these programs. And what I mean by hide is, we can be visible by asking questions, the Facebook group are submitting questions to potentially the teacher on a q&a. But a lot of times when you’re in these peer based groups, it doesn’t always feel like you are like everyone else, meaning that in your head, it’s like why is everyone else so farther along? Why is everyone else seemed to be getting it. But for me, it’s just not clicking. And we deal with these inner battles of feeling like we’re not enough, or we’re never going to make it and it’s all comes from this comparison with other people. Well, the the harsh reality is, we’re comparing ourselves to the persona that other people are projecting into the group. And we all want to look good, we all want to look impressive. So of course, we’re all trying to put our best foot forward. But the challenge with this is it doesn’t always help everyone feel seen. And you don’t really get a clear picture around the inner struggles that everyone has in learning a new skill and doing something new or getting to a breakthrough they’ve never gone to before. So in this interview, we talk about that we talked about being open to critiques and we talked about how important it is to model what you expect in your students and your clients inside your programs. This is an incredible interview. If you’ve ever had any level of discomfort with putting yourself out there or you feel a little like, Ah, why is this so hard for me or you have these inner battles that happened to all of us. As we are growing and learning and changing in our businesses. This episode is definitely for you and a friend and before we dive into this episode, be sure that you head over to check out the new We just launched our brand new website here this month and it is the hub for you to get all of the resources that you need to become more magnetic with your message. On the website, you’re going to get my latest tools and resources to help you be more magnetic when you speak how to become more profitable from speaking how to nail it as a podcast guest. You’re also going to find a suite of over 230 blog posts all curated in marketing speaking business, inspirational personal development and growth, making money and monetizing your voice. There is an article or a podcast episode there for you to help you on this journey. So please do not shy away from the your own growth do not shy away and just think like oh, I’m gonna read one thing and get better. In my world. What I hear so often is people Well listen to this show and then they are hungry for more. So if you want to dive into some more episodes that are really going to be specific to you head on over to Heather poke around a little bit. If you need some help curating a playlist for the podcast that meets you where you are, and helps you take action. Just shoot me a direct message on Instagram, I am at the heather Sager. I love hearing from you all, I love hearing what’s resonated on the shows, I want to know what you’re working on what niche you’re in, in your business, why using your voice matters. So always, always, please send me a message and tell me a little bit more about you. It helps me show up to this microphone with more intention, and it helps me show up in a way that serves you best exactly where you are. Alright, friends, I hope to hear from you on Instagram. And for now let’s jump into the interview.

Heather Sager  6:06  

Hey Sydnea, welcome to the Hint of Hustle. Officially we are doing this interview, we are making it happen. I’m so thrilled you’re here.

Sydnea Lewis  6:14  

Thank you, I’m really excited to be here.

Heather Sager  6:17  

We worked hard to make this happen between schedules and tech. And wildfires, as we were just talking about this is this is happening. And I am so excited for everyone to hear your story today, you and I had the pleasure of meeting about a year ago, virtually a little over a year ago in person a little less than a year ago. And I am just a huge fan of your story and a huge fan of you and your work. So let’s just dig on into it. So why don’t you share a little bit about what your business is. And if it looks different today than it used to look like feel free to share a little bit of that too.

Sydnea Lewis  6:54  

Yeah, so I have a graphic design and branding marketing business and been doing that for quite some time. So usually, it’s been working one on one with people. I’m also yoga teacher, again, working one to group but just as you know, classes. And before we met, I was actually I’m actually also a professor teaching graphic design and business to students on college college courses. And so I was doing a lot, and I’m still doing a lot these days, I have the business has kind of transformed in that where I am no longer doing really long term projects, I do more of intensives like they in a week long intensive to be able to account for what I really want to do, which is the teaching aspect.

Heather Sager  7:47  

And that just brings up an interesting point. I remember, what, six months to even almost a year ago, you didn’t really tell people that you were a professor, tell us a little bit about about that piece.

Sydnea Lewis  8:02  

Yeah, I think that, for me, it’s just the I was I’m a new professor I’ve been doing it for it’s gonna be my to go into the two years, next week, next week, really. And I think for me, because I’m also younger, you know, I’m in my early 30s, I felt that imposter syndrome, right? So it’s, I’ve been doing the business, but now to be able to teach to students and help them I just felt or maybe people would not take me seriously. You know, and so I didn’t talk about it. Even on my social media, I would say I’m just a graduate of the University and then an actual teacher. So we’re now I’m like, Yeah, I teach people how to do what I do. And do it mindfully, you know, with somebody don’t start their businesses going crazy.

Heather Sager  8:53  

Yeah, it’s interesting how our minds play tricks on us. I still think I’m in my 20s Even though I’m very much dot, I still have flashbacks to like, oh, I may. I’m just like a young kid who would listen to me. And then I write down the years of experience. I’m like, whoo, when did I get old? Interested in our minds play play those little tricks on us. All right, let’s talk about how visibility and speaking was showing up with you a year ago. So what what did it look like for you? Were you speaking on stages beyond the classroom? Are you showing up on social What about look like?

Sydnea Lewis  9:33  

A year ago, I had removed myself so once upon a time, I was doing more like networking and kind of getting up there. But I kind of went through a like social anxiety phase and someone outside of it, but where I didn’t really want to be in public spaces. I didn’t want to talk to people. And so which is why being as a graphic designer, we’ll be working one on one was fine. And I found that you Even when teaching yoga, it’s a different type of mindset or two different type of teaching, what I’m teaching to a group who’s come to, to, like, learn from me, but it’s not a, like, conversational, really, you know, so making lighter, make it fun. And then I translate that to teaching my Howard classes, right? They’ve come to learn, make it light, make a frown fun, but it was not so much as like teaching colleagues not teaching those who are, who don’t have to be there, you know, so I felt safer in that environment. But I knew that I, I knew that I eventually wanted to, like, speak on a stage, like, what would that look like, as I’m coming out of this, like, whole, like, experience of not being able to talk socially, you know, to be able to come in, go from a classroom to different events, even going back into the networking and like peers was huge thing for me. And so yeah, a year ago, none of that was happening.

Heather Sager  11:05  

And what changed for you? What What made you decide that you finally wanted to do you wanted to work on this, you wanted to get more comfortable being social, again, getting out there with your voice talking with people,

Sydnea Lewis  11:15  

I had been getting comfortable talking in terms of this classroom. But I remember the first time we met in person, and we were asked what we wanted to do, right? When we had we want to speak in two people. And for me, I knew I wanted to do a retreat. Right? That was I wanted to retreat. But by the time we finished talking that like that was that was put together as like, oh, I want to speak on a stage. Because I know that what I have is so powerful. And what I’m doing, I can do this to the like a larger group, and share with people more than the people who just come to my classes, I can do it, like, bigger. So you

Heather Sager  12:00  

Oh, that’s so sweet. This makes my heart so happy. Not because it’s a gush fest about me. But I we all have that story of we meet someone and whatever we hear them say, or there’s something that happens, it lights a fire in us. It’s like a spark. And it’s such a beautiful thing. I think everyone has a similar story of a mentor or a teacher or someone who’s done that for them. And it’s just so I love it. You know, what’s what’s cool about our story of meeting is you came into my world and a little bit of a different way. So a lot of people come to me because they’re very like, oh, I want to get started with speaking. But you came to me, actually through programming. I’m an affiliate for that you. So you came in another way. So you didn’t initially raise your hand and be like, I want to be a public speaker, you came from more of the business side and more of the let me get comfortable on camera and putting myself out there a little bit. And then you said hell yet let’s do this speaking thing. So I’m, I’m curious around the I don’t even remember, we talked about this before, but how did we initially connect?

Sydnea Lewis  13:07  

So with the affiliate that you mentioned, I had signed up for them and signed up to another affiliate and sold. Some, like I said, in the group who were like, Are there Heather, Heather, and I’m like, oh, and I went to your page. And I and I saw that you were talking again about like, helping with their business and getting comfortable speaking and because I because I just started teaching, like like a classroom setting. I’m like, oh, I want to be helped people to be better for my students, you know, and I want to be able to have, you know, also with the like the slides and presentations that I’m doing, I want that to be great as well. I’m like, Oh, this makes so much more sense. Let me go talk to see and

Heather Sager  13:50  

this is wonderful. This is how you know you’re doing a good job is when other people mark it on your behalf. This is like the key have been referred by others. So to my students in the past who have talked so highly about me, so that we could connect, I’ve just I’m so grateful. So let’s let’s talk about so we connected, you came through that program, you went through some of my bonuses, part of which is you got to come to a live retreat that I hosted, which is what you were describing before. At that retreat, you made the decision of let’s let’s try the speaking thing. So let’s talk a little bit about what happened next. So inside the program, you started working on your talk kind of getting more comfortable. And I know that you also then jumped into my very first round of the signature talk accelerator this last spring, which you’re really, really took and you just went for it. So why don’t you talk a little bit about your experience with creating a talk getting more comfortable speaking what was that like for you?

Sydnea Lewis  14:52  

I think going into it I was a lot. I was in my head and I was like oh I don’t know what to say I don’t know what is like, what am I supposed to be talking about? But what during that retreat, we got clear on the fact of like, what is it that I’m passionate about teaching my students. And so let’s make that my talk, right. And so going from Matt into the next like, last semester, I’m like, Oh, I can use my students as my guinea pigs and start working with my talk out with them. And so that’s what I did. And then the celebrator actually really helped it out because I was able to really outline it and get clear on it. Because I had also signed up to do a actual talk at a conference, like a month after this celebrator that I realized was like my, like a one night stand talk.

Heather Sager  15:49  

Okay, just to clarify, for those listening, y’all know, I’m a little cheeky with my language. So I do teach weird terms to label things in my program. So we talked about different kinds of talks, a lot of times around here, I’m talking about a signature talk. But what Sinead just hit on is something that we call a one night stand talk, which is the still wanted to be a good damn good talk. But it’s not like what you’re known for, and probably not something that you’re going to be doing a lot, but you still want it to be, I mean, fun and really good. So I love that you brought that up in my very weird and probably inappropriate vernacular.

Sydnea Lewis  16:26  

It makes so much sense because so that talk and you talk about imposter syndrome, because that talk went from, you know, I’ve been teaching students, those who are trying to learn from me, in those who are, you know, not necessarily on my quote-unquote level, but trying to get to where I’m trying to get to this talk was to my peers, in those who were above. And so I was totally freaked out. And like, what am I gonna say these people, I sign up to teach them about, like, business and mindfulness in teaching. And again, that impostor syndrome came, you know, because I’m like, I don’t know, why did I sign up for this? Like, what am I supposed to do? But again, you know, we went through it, and I realized, oh, okay, and so I did it in the crazy thing about that is the going into the classroom and going into the room, the presentation room, I had to like change a lot on the fly. Because when I was supposed to be towards other professors, other teachers, when I got into the room, of the 20 people, there were, like four professors, the rest were administrators. And the people who worked for the conference, then wanted to learn about the mindfulness aspect of what they’re do. They’re like, Oh, okay, no problem. Let’s go ahead and switch that up. And so it’s, there was this moment when I just felt so calm like this, it’s fine. You know, this is a talk, I probably won’t do again. So let me just go ahead and have fun with this. And I really got that from that a salary that we did, you know, so it’s a good to say, doing that. Going from last year. was amazing. Then I turned around and did a TV interview about my business. And another podcast interview, like all within like a month times brands, I’m saying,

Heather Sager  18:21  

Yes, I love it, you own to the speaking snowball. And like we mean them in close proximity to really hone in that I can do it, the word that you brought up, I love it. I’ve been hearing this so much from people lately. And it’s been just making my heart so happy. That sense of calm, when you’re in the room, even when things go wrong, or things are different, or whatever else. Let’s talk about that contrast between what it was like for you before having that talk structure. How you felt before versus that moment, on your one night stand talk, how you were able to kind of flip things on the on the fly. So let’s think about before, I know that speaking to peers was a relatively new thing for you. But can you think of another time when you were not so calm, approaching a speaking opportunity?

Sydnea Lewis  19:11  

Well, teaching a teaching at the university classes, definitely not calm at all. I was just very, like, what do I do? Like, let’s go? Yeah. It’s probably like, just like, yeah, just go for it. But it’s interesting, because I’m so grateful that I have the teaching yoga classes experience. First, you know, we’re doing that for a very long time. And so, because I know what that feels like to be calm in there, right in because sometimes it’s like, I didn’t get into the room and like, Okay, we just hit I know, we just go for it. But for me, it was going to the class university classes. It was different for me because I’m like, Oh, I have to actually be a little bit more prepared. And that So we talked about before about being scripted versus not scripted. And even though I have slides for university classes, it’s not really scripted, because you never know what the students are going to say back. So it’s always like this this bundle of nerves. And so that was had been very like, oh, I don’t know, which is why working with you was so important to me because I want to be able to speak better to my students, you know, because even though I could get through a classes fine, and they don’t they don’t see it. I’m just like, Oh, my God, I’m just messing up. I’m so I’m able to do that, you know? So, yeah, teaching classes have been huge.

Heather Sager  20:40  

Isn’t it interesting how, on the outside, no one would ever guess the inner questioning we have about ourselves, or the nerves, or the just the wild thoughts we have in our heads, but your students would have never guessed it. But for you of going, alright, I don’t want to feel this way anymore. As I’m teaching, I want to feel more calm, I want to feel more confident. First of all, just kudos for you for saying, Alright, I’m going to do something different. I’m just curious if you can, if you can remember back, what were some of the specific things that really helps you grow that confidence and really feel more prepared getting in front of the classroom or for your other talks.

Sydnea Lewis  21:19  

So I had a teacher, one of my yoga teachers years ago, when I first started teaching, who when I used to be really freaked out about teaching, because again, I was coming into the yoga studio as a 20 something, teaching people who have been doing yoga for 20 years. And the teacher was just like, it’s not about me, right, it’s about me showing up and serving and, and offering a practice to them. And if they receive it, they do. And if they don’t, that’s okay, too, you know, but all I can do is my best. And so, in terms of what I had to do, prior to really getting the structure, you know, over the last year, it’s just kind of remind myself that, like, I’m going to do my best, and the students are going to get what they need me to get. Yeah, and so it’s okay, if I’m feeling nervous, like, it’s not about me, it’s about them. And so kind of, that really helped me get into like, out of my head, even though I was in my head, but helped me get out of my head in terms of just being able to say, Okay, I’m gonna do it, and just figure it out along the way.

Heather Sager  22:23  

Yeah, it’s so easy for us to get caught up in our own, like our own reality and make it about us, even though we’re so focused on wanting to help other people, our brains play tricks on us. And that’s where a lot of nerves come from, and a lot of apprehension about speaking or any of those, like jitters and stuff. It’s really when we’re so focused, even though we’re trying not to be so that shift you’re talking about around the end of the day, you really just have to focus on the people in the room. And that helps you step out of those nerves. Is it easy? No. Not at all. You mentioned that the scripting versus not scripting piece. That was something that came up can you talk a little bit about the difference around how you approach speaking now versus how you did before?

Sydnea Lewis  23:15  

Before I actually didn’t know the difference, right. So when I first I began my yoga classes, I was teaching children and I had a script, the first day that went out the window when they were like, We don’t care about your script, we just want to do what we need to do. So I had to learn how to speak very specifically to yoga speak on the fly for this, okay, we’re gonna go for it and translate it to my adult classes. The panic came in when I realized I could not do that for university classes. And so I really had to be a little bit more prepared. It’s still like it’s still have some type of outline talk. And go from there even though sometimes I go on a tangent but be more outlined when it came down to things the next level and speaking at on a stage or for actual presentation, because I again, in my head, I did scripts on that first I think we practice I had a full script

Heather Sager  24:17  

did girl you shared that?

Sydnea Lewis  24:20  

I remember there were times when like at the weekend review when we I was told that I looked more comfortable when I kind of went off the script. You know so what I tried to do now is really just be good with my talking points, but also practice you know, I think with the again the downside to me teaching the yoga for so long as i i cannot go into class and just go for it. Because I’m so I’ve been doing it for so long. And I’m in a new space. I’m learning something new. So it’s getting back to the idea of like practicing before I get into the space and really be intentional about it. That’s what I’m trying to do.

Heather Sager  24:57  

Yeah, I love that you brought that that piece out. up is the that that practice piece. A lot of times people think practice means that I’m going to nail the script. So practice is a different way that they say memorization, let me practice isn’t memorized. But what you brought up is the practicing is you use script as a guide, right to make sure that you’re hitting on your talking points you have, we’re a little bit more well thought out when we’re typing right when it’s a little safer in our Google Doc. But when we go into the scene and out loud in front of a group, that feels a little scarier, because we never know what’s going to fly out of our mouth. So we have to really practice to start trusting your voice a bit. So can you share a little bit about how that felt in the practicing process as you started learning to trust your voice a bit more? Well, at first,

Sydnea Lewis  25:45  

again, in my head, I’m like wits, I can point out all the errors, I messed up or didn’t say it, but

Heather Sager  25:53  

maybe, like, Oh, I’m an idiot, ah, like, ah, like, wow,

Sydnea Lewis  25:57  

you know, I can hear I can hear the noises, I can hear this, this. But the more that I got used to it, the easier it became and like that voice just kind of the, it’s there, but it’s not permanent. You know, like, I know that it’s a voice that’s like the downside, but we’re going to focus on what can I do better in a more positive way. And next time, do that, or at least try to do that. So yeah, the practice definitely helps. And it also helps with my timing, and also with the tangents that I like to go on, you know, so just kind of keep it in, you know, in the little, not quite the box. But in the timeframes. I realized that when you’re on a stage or you’re doing a presentation or workshop, you have to be within your timeframe, you know, if you want to respect the spec to your audience, as well as the the people who are putting on the presentation.

Heather Sager  26:47  

Yeah, okay, that’s so freakin good. I love how you brought up that that voice is still there, you just know how to tame it. Or you just know how to put it like, app instead of it being center of your focus. It’s just there. And you know how to now focus on more positive feedback and more. Okay, we’re gonna work on this. Like, I think a lot of people think that that voice is going to go away. But it I mean, here we are. 20 years later, still doesn’t go away, y’all like is there anything that you had to do to give like power, like, pep talk yourself or anything did like get through those practice rehearsals when it felt really awkward.

Sydnea Lewis  27:28  

Definitely. Pep Talk, definitely, like shakes, like, do some shakes, like get the energy out, you know, and, you know, move my body or just like, go from movement to stillness, and back and forth until I just like literally saw myself, okay, you know, what you’re talking about, they are coming to talk to I’ve listened to you, because you know what you’re talking about, it’s kind of kept, keep telling myself that. And then just going and doing it. And then getting rid of getting getting that first, you know, messy one out and then doing it again, and maybe it’s a little bit less messy. And then, and then also what I did, I recorded only record it myself. But I had people come in like so I would just have like my sister come in to like a FaceTime. And I go through it with her and see what she says I’d have my another friend at another time. Like I’d have good life feedback, too. And that really helped.

Heather Sager  28:25  

Yes, I love you’re bringing in some of our advanced strategies, once we get through that first round, right? I think a lot of people are like, how do I make this the best possible out of the gate. Like if I just do the work on the planning, if I do the practice, then I’m gonna knock it out of the park. And what we adopt in our community is the, you know, we just got to get to that first stage, get that that crappy, rough draft, which is never never crappy, just to be clear, is we get that out. And then we start refining, then we start saying, How can I make it better? Then we start bringing in Okay, more critiques, because we’re ready for it. We’ve built up the ability, I think, to hear the critiques. I mean, I know for you, so you went through the VIP track of the the accelerator, and part of that is we practice for weeks, and then we actually do a like a rehearsal in front of a group. I’m actually curious, I’d love to hear your insight on that. It’s a little nerve wracking, right? And in that process, we get critiqued by our peers. And then you also get a critique from me. Talk, talk to us a little bit around one how that process was, like, knowing that you were going to do a pilot for a group of peers before your event, and then just how it was to receive feedback.

Sydnea Lewis  29:36  

It was definitely nerve wracking, but I’m really grateful for it because it’s the same type of group that I actually get the real presentation to peers. You know, it’s I remember, I think we you and I had talked them like it’s nerve racking because I’m like, these are people who are learning the same thing we’re, I’m learning and maybe even me know more. So Again, like who am I to be giving this talk, you know, again, that Pied Piper syndrome, but the more that we, we went through it. And the more that we like talked about it, I remember there was one point when I sent you a message, and I was like, I almost like left the conversation that day, because I’m like, I’m feeling very, like, not overwhelmed, but very, like, Oh, everybody knows more than I know. And I’m like, so far behind and like, I don’t know what to do. But, you know, just being in the room and listening to the people listen to the other other people, it was definitely encouraging. And it’s like, oh, we’re all in the same space, in the fact that people can actually say, it really helped. So by the time we got to the actual pilot, again, it was just that idea, I’m nervous. I’m kind of Loki freaked out, but I’m going to do it, because I know that any feedback that I get is going to be good. And even if like to help me like, be better, like, it’s going to be what I what I need. And you know, I’m not new to getting feedback for you know, my stuff. That’s what I do as a as designers or artists. But it’s, it was a little different. I was really nervous, but I appreciated everything, everything that I received, because then it helped me be better in terms of the actual live talk that I gave.

Heather Sager  31:28  

I love how you describe that around the, it’s easy to get caught up in me who everybody else has their ish together, and I’m not but then realizing that nobody has their ish together. And we’re all in this together. You know, what’s interesting is, as entrepreneurs, especially those of us who teach other entrepreneurs, it’s, it’s kind of hard to play that role of being the student while staying in that mentor teacher role, like holding space for both. And it’s easy sometimes to be like, Well, I don’t want to receive feedback, or I’m open to feedback, but we kind of reject it, because it makes us feel like imposters before then turning around and teaching other people. So there’s not a lot of spaces or programs that really allow for safe criticism. And like true critiques for growth. Because a lot of times it’s very, I don’t know, I think a lot of times we protect ourselves, because we’re trying to posture how we come across. And I don’t know, if you like have had that experience too. But that that’s something that I thought was really cool around seeing this particular group go through it together, you all were like, alright, baby, we’re just gonna, like, bear it all and grow together. And that’s really what made those critiques and those pilots work so well. Just like so. So good. I don’t know if you have any comments on that? Yeah, no,

Sydnea Lewis  32:51  

I think that’s important. And again, like for me, I’m I’m printing is something that I do like, it’s something that we do is something I teach my students to not be afraid of having information given back to them, because there’s always room for improvement. And so I think, going into the VIP of accelerator, it was just like, Okay, I signed up for this, because I want to get better, which means that, you know, you as my coach, you know what you’re talking about. And so I have to be honest, I have to be, you know, actually do my best so that you can see what I where I need help at, you know, and but yeah, there are times I’ve been in spaces where it’s like I don’t people are putting on the front of like, Oh, I’m so great, and that everything is perfect and like, but we’re here to learn, and we’re here to grow. You know, and if, for me, if I’m teaching my students to be open, be open to hear the feedback. I also want to be able to project and be able to literally do what I’m saying for them to do as well. So, and I love the feedback. So

Heather Sager  33:59  

it’s the power of modeling. I love how you said that. If you expect your students to be able to be open to you critiquing or be in an environment of that we have to model that to oh, I forget love that. Okay, this is this is so good. And I’m okay. I’m curious around you. Okay, so we talked about that speaking snowball that you had, right? You gave the talk. You had a TV interview, another podcast interview. Can you talk a little bit about how things have just felt business wise or any other impact of those things? Since because this was just recent. This was it within the last four months or so three months? Yeah.

Sydnea Lewis  34:36  

I think for me, one thing I know. I have been working on my communication, right and just being able to get stand in the things that I know when talking to not only my clients, but just in people relationships and living in that because I realized that that impostor syndrome not only has been prominent in my speaking but also just a lot of a lot of areas of my business and we change that, you know, letting letting it go and just being okay with setting the boundaries, sticking to the boundaries and going forward and actually using my invoice to do so a lot of times I, I hadn’t, you know, like I said, for me, the one on one, in terms of getting uncomfortable had not been something that I’m so used to. But now it’s like really owning that and being okay, moving forward. So every day, every day,

Heather Sager  35:36  

yeah, it’s this. Okay, so the imposter syndrome has been a word or phrase that have come come up a lot in our conversation. I’m curious, how do you how do you just look at and handle impostor syndrome now versus how you did even six months ago?

Sydnea Lewis  35:51  

I think it’s just been a, again, that reminder of all I can do is my best and mind. It just like accepting me. You know, I think at the retreat, that last day, when I’m like, again, bawling in front of you, and because you’re, you’re like, you’re dope, like you have all the, you do the things. And for me, it’s just that reminder of, oh, I’m dope, like, I do the things that more than apply for any any room that I’m in, you know, and I’m can learn and I can grow, and that’s what I’m doing. But where I’m at is where I need to be, you know, and just kind of the constant reminder to myself, that it’s good. You know, and, and putting myself out there and seeing what happens in people who who flocked to me or who comes for me, that’s great. If they don’t, that’s okay, too. I think also just being okay. When people don’t, you know, I realized that that last couple of months, like I have a whole thing would be perfect and being like, you know, on on point, but it’s okay. I don’t have to be it. That’s fine. So

Heather Sager  37:04  

how is that owning that identity of not feeling like you don’t have to be perfect? With your words or with how you show up? How is that? How is that experience been

Sydnea Lewis  37:14  

for you? It’s been very roller coaster, you know, some days are like, yes. And it’s like, oh, wait, tell me that I for the most part, it’s just been a journey, you know? And, again, the constant reminder that it’s okay, I’m not behind. I’m not, you know, I’m not, you know, I’m not behind I’m where Matt’s homeless where I’m supposed to be. And I’m doing what I need to do to move forward.

Heather Sager  37:40  

Beautifully said beautifully said. I think it’s so fascinating. This is why I love having these conversations is so often we hear when when people have guests on that are case studies, right have come through their programs, or have had some kind of transformation, a lot of times are talked about of Ooh, look, look at the problem I had, I went to this thing and now look how awesome it is. And the reality is it is a daily roller coaster. And it’s the UPS it’s the down whether it’s perfectionism whether it’s a new speaking opportunity at higher stakes come up and you got to start the process over again. It’s it’s the recognition that you’re never really going down. Like it’s a constant up, but there are dips, but like the I don’t know if this is making sense, but your level is always climbing I think I talk about it often is like a twisty cone. We think we’re going in circles and we’re never going up but we’re really we’re rising like a spiral up. It just often we don’t see a lot of examples of people talking about how hard it is and how roller coaster easy it is for those things. So thanks for the openness on that. Okay, do you have any any advice or recommendations for anyone listening? Who is in that phase of going all right, I have to been hermit II in my business, maybe hiding a bit and not out there networking or putting my face or my voice out there as much as I would like to to reach my goals. So they’re kind of where you were a year ago, even six months ago. Do you have any advice for them around? How to find the courage to take that first step?

Sydnea Lewis  39:18  

Just starting small like if it’s, I think for me, what before I posted I posted my face again, as posted like the started posting, right and maybe something a meme that I saw but eventually it was just I’m going to post a thought against black background. Right I’m not going to say it verbally but I will type it out. So it’s my thought and then okay, let me see by posting this as a my face. But literally it started with me sharing, you know, and just seeing that part. In it wasn’t my face. Now I am posting my face a little bit more but it just started with just let me post a thought and getting getting okay with if people like it or not, it’s, they don’t have to like it. I’m just posting it for me, because it’s something that I love and I want to share it share with the world.

Heather Sager  40:18  

Honestly, that is some of the best advice I have heard in a very long time. It’s one of the simplest things, but when we think about having the courage to show up, people jump straight to face to camera, or they, they don’t start small, they think it’s small, but that little piece right there of use your voice but use it in a different way that’s safer, right? It feels a little more psychologically safe to put it out there. But as you’re the one doing it, it’s still scary, but I love that you said do it for yourself. You were doing it for you just to establish that that confidence so that you can keep going. Oh, that’s so good. That’s so good. Where can people follow you connect with you learn more about what it is that you do.

Sydnea Lewis  40:58  

So I am at my name is Sydea Lewis, dot com. Everything actually just redid my website.

Heather Sager  41:07  

We’ve been working hard on that

Sydnea Lewis  41:11  

actually has all the things that I do on it now it has links to my socials and like a full bio all that but it even links to my my businesses in general. So

Heather Sager  41:21  

okay, that’s great. We’re gonna link to all of that in the show notes. So now I’m so proud of you. I am so excited for what’s to come for you you have worked your tail off over the last year really getting clear around what your message is and how you want to show up in this world and I have no doubts that you’re going to continue to do really really big things. Thank you all right friends we hope you enjoyed this conversation today. We will see you on the next episode

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